Kielbasa

So, the question I get a lot now is: WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN!?

So, Let me take the time and explain the month of July to the very few of you people who actually read this, but probably shouldn't.


-For weekday mornings, from 8-2, I was teaching little bastards about Marine Biology. Most of them wanted to do whatever the shit they wanted while I tried talking about phylums and intertidal zones and all that jazz. It’s ok though, because the children I hate today become the adults that I hate tomorrow.

-on most nights and Weekends I worked at Sears doing the fun bitch work. Though for most nights I was so tired from working the job before that it would take me one day to build one or 2 grills. But for some reason, no matter how tired you are, you still can destroy something with such malice and lust for destruction. Destruction is what gets me through the day. And now at work, all I do is build one grill then throw screw drivers into the box for hours on end, hoping to be as good as the great THROWDINI, or maybe, just maybe, as good as THROWGALLI! (For those of you who don’t know what I'm talking about, congratulations on not being a nerd. For those who know what I'm talking about: News Radio Rocks!)

-Randomly through out the weeks, I had to take exams and read and do discussions for my online class. The books were good, but some of the poetry was pretty shitty. I did enjoy the French Poet Baudelaire a lot though. His work "Flowers of Evil" was really good. I especially liked the poem "Day's End" which talks about how life is boring and tedious, and how he longs for death as a form of replenishment. For some reason, I can relate. Hmmmm wonder why.

So other than those 3 things, what Have I done?

-Went to a Fourth of July BBQ at Tara's. That was fun. Ate food, went swimming, then used crummy legal fireworks to destroy the package they came in (It was shaped like a rocket ship!

- Went to Ozzfest! Man was that a good time. All the bands ruled (although I was pissed I was late and missed Soilwork). Ran into Phil and his brother in-law and stayed with them for a while. But them shit got out of hand and people started throwing mud, very disrespectful to the bands. And I kept moving as the mud fights kept getting bad, until everyone who didn’t want to be involved in the fight were trapped in the corners and the mud fighters had 2 ranks throwing mud back and forth like a god damn civil war fight. So Brandon and I decided to run through it. I take one step forward and I hear "GET THEM!" so I extend both arms, extended my middle fingers, and ran screaming "FUCK ALL OF YOU!". So I make it to the end, and there is no one there in the opening, everyone is either in the corners or the back wall. So to make a long story short (too late): I pissed in a Gatorade bottle, loosened the cap and threw it at the mud people, and then watched the rest of the show. Maiden Killed by the way.

And that raps up July. If I remember anything else... you won’t hear about it, because you don’t care.